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A Shaky Camera Takes Us Backstage
WCWSchvnne: "This shaky cinematography is edgy! GX is most definitely a trend-setting, groundbreaking, hip online parody! And tonight, it's the biggest Sloptro ever live from the Georgia Dome! It's from the Georgia Dome, so it MUST be a huge event! You will see T0Y's first title defense since regaining the Womyns title! Harb will defend the World title against the Kliq's DOAskull! Plus, after three long months, Perfectn returns to
the ring TONIGHT! It's all so very hip AND edgy!"

Harry Caray: "Who is that sitting on the crate in the dressing room? Isn't that BAHU? I heard that he's upset about being booked to be in every segment on the show tonight!"

WCWSchvnne: "That's international star Bag of Popcorn! What is Bag of Popcorn doing here? We'll find out, in a hip AND edgy fashion TONIGHT! Or maybe next week. Or at our next slop-per-view on September 12! Or at at an even LATER date! Dammit, I hate leading on people like this every week. We'll let you know what he's doing TONIGHT OR NOT AT ALL. We really are gonna let you know what he's doing tonight. Seriously, folks."

New EDGY AND HIP Intro
[Second-rate "rap/rock fusion" song plays, as "The Heartbreak Kid of AOL" Yuri is seen walking through flames down a deserted alley. Footage of GHarb77 and G Incognto brawling is superimposed onto a glass case in a baseball card shop. Miss T0Y is seen on the ring apron, raising an eyebrow at Harb. Yuri is seen walking through the flames again, but trips as his 1980s St. Louis Cardinal sweatpants catch on fire. Footage of Foleyite shaking his ass George Michael-style, Battle Monkey doing the Jerry Lewis to the Beastie Boys' "Shake Your Rump", Perfectn chugging a Dr. Pepper to the beat of "Holiday Road" and a shot of DesDev applying eyeliner in the rafters ends the segment.]

Womyns champion Miss T0Y vs. SweetLdyCt (With Steve Case)
Before the match began, The Man They Call Steven Hovis made an appearance to promote his cameo on HBO's "Sex and the City" and to put his latest angle over.

Hovis: "I was just in the back and I got a call from a friend. He said 'Hovis..the bitch did it to me again'. And at that moment, I realized just what I had to do. Steve Case, don't ya get it? Don't you understand? Nobody on AOL cares about your 'greetings from Steve'. And now I'm greeting you with a challenge. If I can beat you at In Your Pants, Tony can return once again. However, if you defeat me, I will go on a 40-day hunger strike."

Case accepted the challenge, and that was that. It was now time for ::Triple H voice:: THE LADIES. As T0Y showed her Womyns belt off in the corner, she was squashed from behind by the behemoth they call Sweet. Sweet pounded away at T0Y, as the GX double feature showed Hovis watching the match in the back. Sweet hit T0Y with her own version of the Vader belly-bump and followed up with a big splash, but refused to pin her. Instead, Sweet stuffed 83 marshmallows in her mouth. Hovis, upset that his record of having 80 marshmallows in his mouth at once was now shattered, stormed the ring and began brawling with Sweet and Steve Case. The threesome brawled into the crowd, as Merogal13 entered the ring. Mero missed a clothesline and was hit with T0Y's patented Superkick From Hell! T0Y held the belt over Mero, and recieved a heel reaction from the crowd.

T0Y: "This is for T00000Y. Not for you, little one."

Bag of Popcorn, Battle Monkey and GANGWARR Backstage
Bag of Popcorn: ::sitting on crate::

BM: "That crackbaby theme of his may be rap, but he has never really played it VERY LOUDLY."

Bag of Popcorn: ::sitting on crate::

GANG: "Screw dis, yo. We came up in this muhfucka to beat and rape GX. Forget it, yo. Mah momz sai' I can get a buck for fitty used CDs at the Wherehouse. Peace out, yo."

BM kicked GANG in the mid-section, powerbombed him onto Bag of Popcorn and then raped both GANG and BOP. Apparently, BM is not impressed by the Wherehouse's policies with used CDs either.

WCWSchvnne: "MAH GOD BAHU'S NEXT ON BATTLE MONKEY'S HIT LIST! TONIGHT, BM WILL RAPE THE CRACKBABY! MAYBE BM IS ON GX'S SIDE AFTER ALL! WHY IS THIS CAUSING ME TO YELL? I DON'T KNOW. I'M OUT HERE SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY WHOOO!!!!!!!!"

The returning MrPerfectn vs. The debuting "Anal Delivery" Carl Hafer (substituting for the catatonic JimmyXite)
After grabbing a mic and referring to BAHUMUTH as a "roody poo painted candy cane ass", Perf took Hafer down with drop toehold and began pounding away at the young upstart. Perf set "Anal Delivery" up for a clothesline, but the young Anal used his speed to avoid the move. Anal attempted a springboard sucidial dive sidewalk slam manuever, but it did not pay off. Perfectn Perfectn-Plexed Hafer for the pinfall win in 2:19. Following the match, BAHU attacked Perf with a crack pipe and grabbed a mic.

BAHU: "Look, we're always going to fight and think we're better than each other, so it's pointless to keep fighting. I'm not going to stop fighting because I know you'll just insult me again, but I'm just saying that we're going to continue fighting pointlessly. It's all pointless and I know I'm just contributing to the pointlessness of our feud, but it's all going nowhere. Hell, I don't know what I'm saying, but I'm saying something. I don't want to appear on this show anymore. If I beat you at September 12, I AM NEVER APPEARING ON SLOPTRO AGAIN. And I'm taking my good friend Outkast WITH ME."

Perf: "A GANE."

LL Cool J's "I'm The Type of Guy" began playing VERY LOUDLY, as a strange stain formed in BAHU's pants. A jubilant Battle Monkey sprinted to the ring, as BAHU hopped in a little clown car and took off, as "Dukes of Hazzard"-style getaway music played. Huge "BM" chants were heard, as The Big Rap Machine helped Perfectn to his feet.

[Footnote: Kuno Powers was seen in the front row during this segment, sharing a Drumstick with Homophobic Screaming Guy.]

Intercontinentally challenged champion "The Heartbreak Kid of AOL" Commisioner Yuri vs. Jobber4WCW (With W46578 & DOAskull)
Yuri wowed fans before the match by treating them to a stirring rendition of Whitesnake's "Is This Love", and then confused them with an impression of The Godfather. Yuri vowed to be the greatest Intercontinentally challenged champion in GX history, as Jobber slid into the ring and began working Yuri over with hard right hands. As W4 & Skull joined WCWSchvnne for color commentary, Jobber knocked Yuri senseless with a short-arm clothesline for a two-count.

W4: "Schvnne, Yuri calls himself the "Heartbreak Kid" of St. Louis. Everyone knows that Davey Concepcion is the "Heartbreak Kid" of St. Louis. Yuri's just an "f'n' jobber."

Jobber tossed Yuri to the outside, where he whipped him into the Spanish announce team's broadcast table. Poor Spanish bastards. Yuri ducked a clothesline and grabbed a chair from ringside, as the first-ever GX tag champs continued to mock Yuri.

DOAskull: "Schvnne, you just spilled soda on my $500 Hawaiian shirt."

Yuri grabbed a chair and rocked Jobber with a vicious chairshot, and proceeded to knock Skull & W4 out with a pair of chairshots. As the referee checked up on the Brahma Skull and the W4rrior, Yuri dragged Jobber back into the ring and applied the "Taz-mission." The ref fondled W4 and Skull, as MekZhaoyun entered the ring and knocked Yuri out cold with an Insecticon. Jobber hit Yuri with the Running Jobber Bomb and pinned him. One. Two Three.

WCWSchvnne: "JOBBER IS THE NEW INTERCONTINENTALLY CHALLENGED CHAMPION! YURI IS GOING TO HAVE A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN!"

KaneRobot and Foleyite Watch"The Tom Green Show " Together In the Back
Foleyite: "Bum is on the Kane. BUM IS ON THE KANE!"

KaneRobot: "Foley, please."

Foley: "Wow, that makes two slop-per-views in a row where I was SUPPOSED to get a title shot, but got screwed out of it. THANK YOU VERY MUCH JOBBER."

Kane: "You're still getting a shot at the number-one contendership, bub. Stop being such an ass."

Foley: "Kane..you better get that GLARE outta your STARE, BOY."

Kane: "Whatever. But you GAWTA ASK YOURSELF, who else would hold people back for your George Michael ass-shake? Well, Andrew Ridgely could use the work. But aside from him? Forget about it, bub."

Special Referee Reverend G Incognto: World champion GHarb77 vs. DOAskull
WCWSchvnne: "The last time G was the special referee for a match of Harb's, it began what many consider to be the most heated feud in GX history. Wait a minute. Why is it that we've had two big matches with special referees on Sloptro in the span of two weeks? What's up with this? This is as ridiculous as the WWF's use of special refs for Holly sake."

To the delight of the GX faithful, the lovable Reverend was an impartial referee for the entire match, but trouble started brewin' when G mentioned that Qui-Gonn Jinn was his favorite character in "Star Wars: Episode 1".

Harb: "I beg to differ. Watto was clearly the best character."

The argument between the two opened the door for a Skull bulldog and a close two-count. Harb and G began shoving each other, as a melodramatic Malaki100 ran to the ring.

Mal: "Would you guys PLEASE STOP THE FIGHTING?!?! Harb, you guys are FRIENDS that have been RIPPED APART. Just like you and Karla were RIPPED APART. Just like Rob and I were RIPPED APART."

Harb: "Mal is right. Hell G, I give you all the credit in the WORLD."

Foleyite: "I'm so sorry to interrupt, but I thought the GX Kliq should say something before you two put a sleeperhold on this audience. Now, how many people came here tonight to see the Right One shake his ass George Michael-style? TELL 'EM JOBBER!"

Jobber: "WEEEEEEEEEEELL, Foleyite's ass is better than G's. I'M smarter than G. And KaneRobot is BIGGER than G, in more ways than one!!!!"

MekZhaoyun: "You could poke THREE eyes out with this thing, MAH GOD."

Every ever-lovin' member of the GX Kliq gave Harb, G and Mal crotch slops, as the old "time to make the donuts" commercial began playing on the GodwinnTron. Rick Parka emerged from the back and attacked Jobber with a bag of Funjuns. Yuri and Merogal13 joined Rick in his battle against the Kliq, as G, Mal and Harb joined the festivities.

WCWSchvnne: "DESDEV!!! DES IS IN THE RAFTERS AGAIN!!! FOR HOLLY SAKE, HE'S BEEN UP THERE FOR 15 DAYS, SOMEONE HELP HIM GET DOWN."

A Lonely Outkast Sits In the GX Bathroom
GX Cameraman: "Do you understand what's happening with BAHU planning to leave, after he beats Perf at 'In Your Pants'?"

Outkast: ::sniffle:: "No."

GX Cameraman: "You gonna miss everyone?"

Outkast: "Yeah."

GX Cameraman: "Do you find me attractive?"

Outkast: "Yeah."

[GX Camerman and Outkast embrace.]

Nearby Radio Playing: "Don't leave me hiiiiiiiiiiigh...don't leave me dry."

[Fade to black.]