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GX Monday Sloptro
Live from VADER's MALL
03/15/99

Backstage Footage
[DrkIsSOP, Yuri , "Handsome" Steven Hovis, Miss T0Y,Ryan845278621-900-WET-TITS, GUNN, KENICKIE and IceWolfX69 emerge from a limo. Drk says "I looooove being a SOOOP!" as Yuri and Hovis hold a cape over a man wearing an A's hat.]

GX Intro.
WCWSchvnne announces that we will be treated to a greater-than-great-PPV-caliber-match that-you-won't-see-on-the-other-message-board in Foleyite vs. W46579 later in the show. He also announces that FUSS cannot be here tonight as he is in San Jose to tape an interview DaveyDog30. Filling in for FUSS will be 1980s pop culture icon,ALF. Schvnne asks ALF if he can call a Sloptro without screwing up,and ALF replies "No problem!"

The debuting MekZhaoyun vs. Norman Smiley
Mek entered the ring wearing nothing but circa 1987 Transformer Underoos to the following entrance music: "<bass> MEKPAAAAAAAAWWWWWK!! Black Guy: MekPac! Straight outta Wisconsin,a crazy mutha fucka named MEK-PAC. The psycho negro sucked it,in his sigs he say "fuck it", his little sister's gettin' laid in the backs of pick-up trucks, shit. Godwinneration X..who's gonna screw his sis?...Godwinneration X...Tell 'em.." Before Mek and Smiley locked horns, an outraged MrPerfectn stormed the ring and tossed both men to the outside as he got on the mic. Perfectn: "SUDS-O!!!!!!! SUDS-O!!!!! LOOK AT ME SUDS-O!!!!!! Sloppamania. If I win,you have to join the 1990s until you win a match on Sloptro. If I lose, I'll take my ass back to the 1980s like you want. So Suds? At Sloppamania,be prepared to get your ROO-TY POO PAINTED CANDY CANE ASS kicked by Perfectn!" [Huge Pop.]

Bibby Promo
[Bibby is on location at a Pumpkin Patch in Anaheim,California talking to a pumpkin with a picture of Margaret Cho taped to the side of it.]
Bibby: "Mother, the devil has come before me in the shape of JimmyXCite. I must forgive you for what I'm about to do. It's something I must do. And maybe -one day - we can all be as one -as a family again."
[David Bowie's "China Girl" plays in the background as they go to a commercial.]

KING DIAMOND Special Interview
[Foleyite brought Diamond to the ring to great applause and thanked him for coming.]
Diamond: "I'm just glad to be here. I've loved GX since my youth."
Foleyite: "Who were some of your favorite GXers growing up?"
Diamond: "Bruno Incgnito!"
Foleyite: "HA HA JA. Well,I must say that.."
[The keyboards of "The Final Countdown" blared over the PA,as SUDS entered the ring to a surprisingly positive reaction.]
SUDS: "diamond u r a fag. u come out here in ya little GLAM panties and try to step into mah world. EHH UHHH,naw see this is mah world son."
Foleyite: "I would suggest,Mr. SUDS,that you calm down.."
SUDS: "basically..I'm sayin I want a piece o' king diamond's ass. u got ur beady little GLAMMER eyes locked on THE WORLDS BIGGEST 80s ICON. and if ya didnt understand that,heres to ya"
[SUDS then did "The Running Man" and Diamond's fists went flying,as GX officials crowded the ring and the fans went crazy.]

DaveyDog30 Special Interview Promo

"Sassy." "Gay cocksucker." "U R A NIGGER." These are just some of the words used to describe DaveyDog30. For the past year,DaveyDog30 has burrowed a path of destructive NCs through Godwinneration X. What makes a man so deranged? Over the next six weeks, I'm going to take you through the journey of DaveyDog30: story of a boyhood dream...turned into a living hell.

DrkIsSOP & Yuri (With IceWolfX69) vs. GHarb77 & DOAskull (With Charisma93)
WCWSchvnne: "Joining us in the broadcast booth is Davey's good friend and the man who will face YURI at Sloppamania, AAisWAR. SIDEWALK SLAM! This is the greatest moment in the history of great moments of GREAT MOMENTS <orgasm>"
AAisWAR: "TES. Thank you,Tony. I'm taking care of Davey's obese cat while he's away. We miss Davey."
[ALF ate the cat within seconds and yelled "Hey Davey,where's the cat? HA!"

Harb and Skull were attacked from behind by the SOPs and Skull was quickly thrown to the outside. Drk and Yuri hit Harb with a double-clothesline,a flapjack and their own version of the Doomsday Device before pinning Harb for a 2-count. (AAisWAR: "Yuri's a very interesting competitor to say the least.") Yuri slapped the WTF submission on Harb,and Schvnne had a stroke explaining to AA that he would be facing this soon in an epic match. (ALF: "IceWolfX69 reminds of Mrs. Ochmonek! HA!") Yuri released the hold and tagged Drk in. Drk t0yed around with Harb and made several sexual gestures - which strangely enough - Harb enjoyed. Drk hit the Death Valley Driver,but Skull came in to make the save. After countering a reverse chinlock with a side suplex, Harb made the hot tag to Skull and Skull cleaned house. Charisma distracted the referee by stripping completely nude and pouring honey all over herself,as AA ran in the ring and attacked Yuri with the GX belt. The ref turned around and Skull pinned Yuri for a One..Two..Thr--shoulder up. G Incognto then stormed the ring and covered Charisma up with a life-size Trent Dilfer poster to a chorus of boos. An angry Harb called G "GX's version of Hovis" and the two began arguing on the outside as Yuri hit "The Nervous Breakdown" on Skull for the 3-count.

Foleyite (With Jobber4WCW) vs. W46579 (With "Handsome" Steven Hovis)
Before the match,W4 grabbed a mic and said that Foleyite could either fight him and get his ass kicked - or take one of his finest "oh ho!"s and join the SOPs for the WHOLE NIGHT. Foleyite responded with "The Beatles suck,you friggin' SOP" and W4 clotheslined him out of his boots. W4 press-slammed Foley and sent Foley to the outside with a flying shoulderblock. Hovis began talking trash,as a distracted Foleyite was again clotheslined by W4.
Hovis: "Foley, I finally figured out why you've hated me all my life. You're just as big a SOP as me. You're upset that you lost T0Y to me. I can't blame you,I wish to god I'd known her all my life. You couldn't hold on to T0Y and you'll never get the AG. You're a fucking loser and total idiot. You wish you were the SWINGIN' BACHELOR that Handsome Hovis is." W4 came off of the top rope,but Foleyite caught him with a powerslam and followed up with a facebuster. Foley pinned W4 for a two-count. Hovis then began chanting "The SOPs are right." W4 rolled the distracted Foley up,but Foley kicked out at 2. Foley ducked a series of W4 clotheslines,and eventually scored with a weak superkick. Foley rose to his feet,and stomped in the corner of the ring as the crowd clapped along,but Hovis grabbed Foley's leg. W4 rolled up Foley and put his feet on the second rope for leverage to get the huge upset win.
Following the match,Foley grabbed the mic: "Hovis, you FAT piece of shit. First of all, I don't care about T0Y one way or the other. But, if I beat you here next week in a Smell in the Cell match, T0Y's no longer yours. Hell, I'll throw in some Ho-Hos and Hostess Snowballs if you're not interested in accepting the match. Come on Hovis,what'll it take? Rice Krispie Treat? Rack of lamb?" [Jobber held Foley back saying "You're going too far" and Hovis stormed the ring. The entire GX locker room appeared in the ring and brawled with the SOPs who emerged from the crowd. A man wearing all black,a mask and an A's hat watched the brawl from the top of the ramp as the show ended.]

WCWSchvnne: "WHO IS THAT MAN IN THE A'S HAT!?!?!?!?!?!
ALF: "I don't know Tony,but I think I've got a hairball coming up. HA!"
WCWSchvnne: "WERE OUTTA TIIIME!!!! FANS WELL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!!!!!!!!"

[Fade to black.]