Vince McMahon, You Look Like You Have Something To Say-Do YOU?
Vince: "Yes. Tonight, we will witness a truly beautiful moment when Outkast weds Foleysis. And just to make sure that I don't stand by and watch another wedding fall to pieces, I have BANNED the Kliq from the wedding. That includes you, Foleyite. Only family members, invited guests and underrated Caucasians that worked on the often-funny-albeit-short-lived sketch comedy "In Living Color" are allowed. And one more thing. MrPerfecnt, G Incognto and several other people don't like the way I run things? That's fine and dandy. Because I have just entered myself in that Royal Stumble thing, and whoever eliminates me will have complete creative control of GX. Does anybody have a problem with -AGGGGH! AGGGGH! AGGGGGH! AGGGH!"

If you're wondering why Vince McMahon just screamed "AGGGH!" several times, then it's probably best to know that World/Harbcore champion Battle Monkey had surprised him from behind and raped him. Hence, the troubled shouts of "AGGGH!", with the varying number of G's.

Handicap Match: MrPerfectn vs. God & Trent Dilfer
Perfectn won. (Yes, this is an unusually short segment for Sloptro, but the wedding thingy really eats up a lot of time.) But something of great significance happened after this match. Vince McMahon stormed to the ring, still rubbing his backside after another infamous BM rape. Vince shocked the world by stripping the outrageous champion of the World and Harbcore titles. Wow, all that build-up of "who would be able to beat BM for the World title" and Vince just stripped him of the belt. Talk about an anti-climax.

Malaki100 vs. IceWolfX69
This was to establish a #1 contender to Miss T0Y's Womyns title, should T0Y have to defend it next Monday night. Of course, T0Y might be able to avoid that, with the strange Stumble stipulations and all of that jazz, but it's always best to have a back-up plan. The Canadian Behemoth lashed out at fans for chanting "KILL THE CANADIAN", and then encouraged fans to kill people who chanted "KILL THE CANADIAN". Mal didn't kill anyone, but she did pull out the Sabu moves to become victorious in another extraordinarily short match. After Mal's hand had been raised Womyns champ Miss T0Y appeared on the GodwinnTron. And no, Mal did NOT lose her top.

T0Y: "Big deal. It won't mean anything. I'm gonna win the Royal Stumble on Sunday, which means that I won't have to defend the Womyns title. It'll also mean that I'll get a World title shot at Sloppamania. And since a Kliq member already has that belt, that'd be quite the conundrum. So yeah, anyway, this win will be in vain, because you won't even get the chance to wrestle me, let alone a chance to beat me. I think my work here is done."

Battle Monkey and Hardcore Holly Are a Tad Peeved At Vinny Mac
BM: "VINCE, WHAT KIND OF A MAN ARE YOU?"

Vince: "This coming from a guy who finds pleasure in raping men. Look, the Royal Stumble will now just be for the World title. A la Royal Rumble '92."

Holly: "Point well taken on the man-raping, but I was supposed to get a shot at those titles. This is rather unfair to me."

Vince: "Ok, the World and Harbcore titles will be up for grabs in your guys' match then, with the Stumble still being for the title shot at Sloppamania."

BM: "Ok, the angle's put over now. But this segment still needs a punchline."

Holly: "I know. Well, I got nothin'."

AAisWAR - Live from Flaming Lowell's
AA: "Due to the bad blood between Foleyite and I, I was barred from the arena tonight. What crap. What bullshit. But it's ok. After Sunday, Foleyite will be gone for good. What goes around comes around."

Old Man at the Bar: "Oh yeah? Try me on for size."

AA: "No thank you, Mr. Crabtree. Besides, your character is a blatant rip-off of the guy from 'Big Daddy', and I'd like NOT to be reminded of that movie. Ever....just like I'd like NOT to be reminded of Foleyite ever again after Sunday."

Old Man at the Bar: "Good segue."

The Zac -n- Prozac Connection vs. Mr. ANTI & Hardcore Kim
Instead of a lovable song that referred to ANTI's..odd chicken gimmick, The ANTI One and Kim came out to no music whatsoever. Crowd no likey. But they did like what would come next. The team of KaneRobot & Yuri, escorted by GHarb77. (Harb is feuding with ANTI & Kim. Let's not start anymore "Freebird-like trio to form" rumors.) Of course, due to that restraining order and the 40 cops that were hired to stand on the entrance ramp while they should be out working, Harb was not allowed anywhere near the ring. The Connection was. GX's odd couple ran to the ring, and ducked a pair of clotheslines. Big KR left his feet and hit ANTI with a dropkick. Yuri just grabbed at Kim's faded Bon Jovi shirt and tried to rip it off. As kim and the Heartbreak Kid of AOL had a tug-of-war over her shirt, ANTI swatted away a second Kane dropkick and dropped a leg across the big man's back. Meanwhile, Yuri continued to obsess over ripping off the New Jersey Devil's shirt.

Kim: "Get your hands OFF of me, you little pervert!"

Yuri: "KANE DUDE CHECK IT OUT IM RIPPING KIM'S F'N SHIRT OFF HAHAHA"

ANTI: "LMAO! Check this out, babycakes!"

Still the master of using strange foriegn objects, ANTI yanked a brass candlestick holder out of his tights and clocked Yuri in the back of the head with it a la George Harrison's wife. Kim and ANTI high-fived and then turned around to meet a KR flying clothesline from the top rope. Wasting no time, the Big Hanson-Lovin' Machine scooped up ANTI for his finisher. The New Jersey Devil was about to intervene with a low-blow, when Yuri came from behind and ripped off her shirt. Kim covered herself up, not unlike the Donald Duck cartoon where he loses his shirt and covers himself up, though he never wore pants to begin with. The Heartbreak Kid of AOL marked out for himself, as Kane delivered the Legacy of Brutality and pinned ANTI. One, two, three. Harb applauded from the ramp and shared a Snowball with one of the cops. An embarrassed Kim put her shirt back on, and grabbed a microphone.

Kim: "Harb, you're just a big a pervert as Yuri. Harb, I know you want me."

Harb: "With all due respect, do NOT flatter yourself."

Kim: "Whatever. I'm willing to forget about the restraining order, Harb. If you can eliminate ANTI from the Stumble, we'll drop it. And by the way, the restraining order isn't eligible in the Stumble since you were both entered in the thing before the restraining order. So you can be within 40 feet of ANTI and I then. THEN, you can be near us as much as you want, if you can eliminate ANTI. And just to sweeten the deal, you can have me for 30 days. But if ANTI eliminates you? Haha, you will EAT HIS FECES."

WCWSchvnne: "This is it, fans. The last Sloptro main event of the millennium."

Jerry Lawler: "Ah...you mean the last Sloptro main event before the Royal Stumble."

WCWSchvnne: "That too! What a NIGHT!"

The Marine from Milwaukee and the most popular creepy-guy-in-rafters since Sting (the wrestling guy, not Gordon Sumner) both made dramatic entrances, firing up the crowd for their possible eventual meeting during the Royal Stumble. Once the bell had rung, Mek ran to the ropes and began climbing his way to the pole. Unfortunately, Des shook the top ring rope, causing Mek to fall pole-first on the top turnbuckle. I think Des might have side-suplexed the Kliqster off of the ropes, but we'll never know. Thank Foleyite, who interfered and shook his ass George Michael-style, while Jobber4WCW and the World tag team champs W46578 & DOAskull joined the assault. Soon Pete Lothario and Battle Monkey helped beat Des up, as the bookers wondered why the Kliq had to have so many damn people in it. Come on, it takes forver to mention each individual member. Luckily, the T0Y Brothers left the group. That made it easier. Speaking of them, they saved Des from the attack, continuing their bitter feud with their former pals, the Kliq. Since we need to build up to the Stumble, everyone on the roster came out and had a mini-battle-royal. The only Stumble competitors who didn't appear: Miss T0Y, Vince McMahon, and the three mystery participants.

WCWSchvnne: "What a way to end the show before the Stumble! With a mini-battle-royal! Oh my!"

Jerry Lawler: "We still have the wedding."

WCWSchvnne: "Oh. Well, I'm sure that'll be good too."

A beautiful set worthy of a Friday showing of "Days of Our Lives" was constructed in the ring for what was sure to be a magical moment. Reverend G Incognto performed the ceremony, of course. But before the lovely, young couple walked that aisle, a bunch of women never before seen on a GX show would be escorted to the ring by GX superstars. The deceased Mary Kay Bergman was escorted by KaneRobot. The decaying carcass of Shirley Hemphill was escorted by a teary-eyed Kuno Powers. Alexandra Wentworth, an attractive and occasionally funny comedienne who hasn't seen steady work since "In Living Color", was escorted by Carl Hafer. Unfortunately, Foleyite refused to escort his mother, and Foleyite's mother refused to show up at all. Anthony Michael Hall and Della Reese were suitable substitutes. The crowd than laughed, as Outkast made his way to the ring to Radiohead's "Lucky". As expected, Vince McMahon escorted Foleysis to the ring. Since we're short on time, let's fast forward past the "I do" stuff.

>>>>

G: "Should there be anyone who disapproves of this marriage, let them speak now or forever hold their piece."

Crowd: "KUNO. FOLEYITE. KLIQ. OUTKAST'S DAD. DUSTIN DIAMOND, BETTER KNOWN AS SCREECH POWERS FROM SAVED BY THE BELL."

G: "If anyone wants to interrupt this beautiful moment and get really over as a heel, here is your opportunity. Right now. Hurry up, if you're going to ruin this for them. THIS IS YOUR CUE. IN THE BACK? HELLO."

Over the P.A.: "Montel, is this wrong?"

Wearing a leather jacket with a dead daffodil pinned to the sleeve, Foleyite emerged from the back with something to say.

Foley: "I know Vince said that the Kliq would be fired if we ruined the wedding, and that only the people invited and family members could be here. Well, I'm Foleysis' older brother, so I'm a family member. Hey Outkast! Remember me, little buddy? Well, I know you're in love with my sister and all, but I thought you should take a look at THIS."

Footage of Foleyite & Jobber4WCW Walking Up To a Warehouse Full of Strobe Lights Is Seen on the GodwinnTron
Stoned Asian Girl: "Hey man, I know you guys, aren't you the Kliq?"

Foleyite: "Yes, we are. And we need some Ecstasy. We're gonna get Foleysis stoned, so Jobber can marry her, therefore ruining her relationship with Outkast."

SAG: "RED LEATHER PANTS, DUDE? YEAH RIGHT! Who the fuck in this day and age wears red leather pants to look cool? NARC! BEAT IT, NARC!"

Foleyite: "Let's fast forward this footage a bit, shall we?"

Footage of Jobber4WCW and a Foleysis at the Drive-Thru Window of a Jack in the Box
Pedro: "And that'll be $10.87, sir. Hey, you're Jobber4WCW!"

Jobber: "Yes, I am. Say, you wouldn't happen to be able to legally marry us, would you?"

Pedro: "What a coincidence! As of yesterday, I am! And who'll be your bride?"

Jobber: "The virtuous, lovable valley girl ..Foleysis. Can you hurry up? 'I wanna be home in time to catch that Behind the Music of Dr. Dre. Just get to the I do part."

Pedro: "Ok, do you Jobber4WCW take Foleysis to be your lawfully wedded wife, through sickness and in health.."

Jobber: "I do. Foleysis, what'd you say? ::falsetto:: I DO. THERE. We're married. Hand the certificate over, Pablo. Yeah, yeah. Hurry up. Dre'll be on any minute."

Pedro: "Here's your gift certificate for $5 at any participating Jack in the Box, here's your free order of curly fries and thank you."

Jobber: "No, thank you, Pueblo!"

Pedro: "One question, though. Why does your wife look like she's unconscious? Sir? Hello? Uh, should I call the cops? This isn't right. Um, sir? Sir?"

Jobber, looking at camera: "I want you to get a good shot of the NEW Mr. and Mrs. Jobber4WCW."

WCWSchvnne: "I do not believe this. This is a damn disgrace. Why Jack in the Box? Why not In-n-Out, for God's sake? My god, what a disgrace."

Foleysis, in tears: "Chris, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. He's a friend of my brother's. He was just gonna take me out for a Jumbo Jack, but I fell asleep in the passenger seat. I had no idea he'd do this. I HATE YOU, JOBBER. I HATE YOU."

Jobber4WCW: "Hey 'Kast. I bet you're asking yourself - not did we - but how many times did we make fun of your SHITTY COLLECTION OF RADIOHEAD ALBUMS." ::crotch chop::

Outkast: ::stomps around ring, looking extremely pissed off::

WCWSchvnne: "AW, DAMMIT. THIS YOUNG GIRL JUST HAD THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY OF HER LIFE RUINED BY THAT SON OF A BITCH. OUTKAST IS FUMING."

Vince McMahon: "I'd comfort you, Foleysis, but I really don't know you that well."

WCWSchvnne: "This is worse than Test and Stephanie. Foleysis doesn't even get the comforting Vince hug. Dammit, this is no way to lead into the Royal Stumble. This is a dark d.."

Jerry Lawler: "Dark day in GX history. You've said that a million times. Damn, get some new material."

[Fade to black.]