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GX 1 Year Anniversary Deluxe Extra-Special Extravaganza '99
Live from the GX Arena in Bitters,Arkansas
03/07/99

[Cameras cut immediately to DaveyDog in the middle of the ring as soon as they went on the air.]

DaveyDog30: Are we on? Schvnne? Am I on? Can we please do this already? Ok, I have some things I need to get off of my chest. It's a long story,and I'll try to make this as short as possible 'cause I know we've got a packed show tonight. You people know that I've been battling these SOPs for months now and maybe you know..maybe deep down I'm just as bad as the SOPs. The Dog that stands before has a troubled past,and maybe...I'm sorry. I can't do this
anymore. For anyone who ever enjoyed a DaveyDog post or a night with me in Wrestling Chat..thanks. And if ya didn't..well,hey..you won't be seeing DaveyDog30 in a GX arena for a while.

[The crowd was literally shocked into silence. Several girls and LOTS of young men in the front row with "I LOVE YOU Dayvey Dawg" signs were crying as "DA-VEY DOG" and "PLEASE DONT GO PLEASE DONT GO" chants started up.]

WCWSchvnne: Goodbye DaveyDog30..and thank you.

[GX Anniversary Intro: Marilyn Monroe's "Happy Birthday Mr. President" is played over footage of the GXers zaniest moments.]

WCWSchvnne: Fans,we are back and I..I just don't what to say. DaveyDog has apparently retired on a night where GX is preparing for their biggest show of the year..this is certainly a blow for GX. Davey is still here hugging the fans at ringside. We'll stay with this until we can get some clarification. In the meantime,I'd like to introduce my new broadcast partner MFUSS to the booth.

MFUSS: I m glad daveys retiring that fee fruit in the bax catfish head napy head roach

WCWSchvnne: You lamebrain.

[The GX Theme starts up as all of GX and their ally JimmyXCite make their way to ringside with mics.]

AAisWAR: Davey? WTF
DaveyDog30: Look, I have a troubled past and it's nothing something I can hide anymore ok?
JimmyXCite: HA HA JA,Davey,you old jock you! Good one. I almost believed that bullshit for a second.
DaveyDog30: FUCK YOU JIMMY FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.
GHarb77: This is not happening.
G Incognto: DAVEY COME BACK HERE
Charisma93: DAVEEEEEY!!!!!!
JimmyXCite: I'm sorry,guys. I didn't know that would piss him off.

[Davey walked to the back,stopped midway down the aisle with tears in his eyes looking back at GX and then continued walking to the back. (see Shawn Michaels at October 1995 "In Your House" to picture this better.]

[Out of nowhere,the SOP theme started up and DrkIsSOP,GUNN and Yuri appeared at the top of the ramp.]

DrkIsSOP: My my my...is GX getting a little bit...dare I say it? SOPpy? [Crowd started huge chants of "ASS-HOLE".]

Yuri: DAVY go ahead and leave yo and AA pretend you are having a homosexual relationship and foleyite masturbates in his car with G handing him toothpaste [The crowd was confused,but booed heartily anyway.]

DrkIsSOP: It's this simple GXers. Sloppamania? The big show? Team SOP vs. Team GX. Best of 7. And as for tonight, AA has GUNN to worry about it,and we have a few more surprises up our sleeve. [GUNN grabbed the mic and called AA a "wigger,if you smeeeeeell the barbecued chicken ah'm cookin',u niggers" as the crowd threw tons of trash at him.]

Yuri 9186, IceWolfX69, and Drk vs. GHarb77, DaveyDog30, and Charisma93
With Davey out of the picture, the SOPs dominated the Harb/Char duo. Yuri put on his Bret Hart sunglasses and jacket and hit on Charisma,but was quickly kicked in the rectal exuberant oxternal exipirent region. Harb kicked Drk in the mid-section and executed a Slop Cold Stunner,but was speared from behind by IceWolf before making the pin. Char leapt at IceWolf,and the two began brawling outside. Meanwhile,Yuri and Drk hit Harb with a spike
piledriver,and took turns legdropping him. G Incognto emerged from the back to a HUGE pop,and wasted no time in giving Ice a Backdrop Driver From Hell on the outside. As G slid into the ring to save Harb, Char screamed "G,you're our hero." G stopped short and said "Really? Well...I try..". Yuri and Drk held Harb up to see what G was doing. Harb screamed "G!?!?!? WTF" before being hit with a Yuri/Drk Double Russian Leg Sweep. Yuri pinned Harb for
the 3,and the SOPs celebrated as the crowd started a "G's FINALLY GONNA GET SOME <clap clap clap clap clap>" chant.

The debut of KaneRobot vs. SUDS
The GX fans tried their best to headbang as Kane entered the ring to Old Skool Metallica. Drunk Guy in Front Row had to be wheeled away on a stretcher. Suds recieved many boos as "The Final Countdown" played over the PA. Jobber4WCW,who had bought 5 seats just for a GX sign,leapt over the railing and zapped Suds with a tazer. Kane rolled to the outside and powerbombed Suds through a press table. "Don't you dare bring your glossy 80s GLAM shit into
my world",Kane yelled. Kane and SUDS brawled in the ring for a good 5 minutes until SUDS pulled a Viewmaster out of his tights and beat Kane over the head with it. SUDS put the 1988 Reeboks to Kane and signalled for the "Final Countdown." Then MrPerfectn appeared on the GodwinnTron with SUDS' Teddy Ruxpin. SUDS broke down and cried,muttering "Nobody goes there..." KaneRobot rolled up SUDS from behind,scoring a HUGE upset win. WCWSchvnne talked about
what a great debut this was for Kane for 23 minutes.

GX World Tag Team Champions Cal Worthington and Crazy Gideons vs. "Handsome" Steven Hovis and "The Iceman" Benny Bibby
Gideon and Cal took control right from the get-go,as they attacked Hovis and Bibby with a VCR and a handful of camel dung,respectively. Cal tossed Hovis to the outside and slammed Bibby. Gideon came off the top with the Psycho Splash,but let Bibby up after 2. Cal went to work on Hovis' FATASS with a trash can, as Bibby and Gideon traded headbutts. Foleyite and JimmyXCite emerged from the crowd and attacked Bibby and Hovis with a pair of pumpkins.
A masked man came from under the ring,and hit Gideon's knee with a nightstick. Then out of nowhere W45679 made his triumphant return to an ENORMOUS POP!!!!! W4 entered the ring and DDTed Foleyite. WCWSchvnne had a heart attack and screamed "NO DAMMIT NO." The SOPs,W4 and the masked man went to work on Foley,Jimmy,Gideon and Cal until The Godwinns came to the ring to rescue them.

GX Champion AAisWAR vs. GUNN
Before the match,AA talked about how things were'nt the same without Davey. He bashed G and Harb for fighting over Char to a mixed reaction and demanded that from now on,he enter the ring to Earth Crisis. While still on the mic,GUNN slid in the ring and applied the BBQ Cookout on AA. AA answered the referee's "Do you give up?" by saying "I don't care." The crowd started "WE WANT DOG" chants throughout the whole segment. AA reached the ropes
after 3 minutes and GUNN was forced to break the hold. AA again grabbed the mic,looked up at the ceiling and said "I respect you,bookerman." AA went to the back, GUNN started singing some Hank Williams Jr. song and the crowd was absolutely flabbergasted.

Backstage Interview With The SOPs
"The Heartbreak Kid of AOL" Yuri and DrkIsSOP bragged about tonight's win and how their plan to cause dissension in the GX ranks is working. The masked man,Bibby,Hovis and T0Y hugged W4,stating that the team of Foleyite and Jimmy was doomed to fail. The masked man took the mask off,only to reveal Ryan576296898698. Drk shoved Yuri aside to say "All the people wanna know why W4 turned SOP? Well,it's real simple." W4 looked down at the floor as he said
"Davey would have wanted it this way." The SOPs laughed and showered each other with champagne as T0Y and IceWolf gave them all handjobs. The camera moved to a shot of W4 looking over at the SOPs,whispering to himself "Davey would have wanted it this way."

[Fade to black.]