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HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

I get the print edition, which lags behind the digital subscriptions. So just tell me this: for the Rookie of the Year voting, was Nicholas unanimous?
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2019 1:57 am Post subject:

KaneRobot · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2143 Location: Bitters, Michigan

^^^ Ron Killings accepting a rookie of the year award seems like something they'd have him do.
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HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

This is utter bullshit. Ronda Rousey was bloodied by a crutch to the face from Becky Lynch. Rousey was violently beaten up by Charlotte Flair. Rousey was double-teamed by the Bella Twins, and attacked by the Riott Squad, and slapped by Stephanie McMahon.

Nicholas doesn't have a goddamned mark on him. So far, he has an immaculate career.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Sat Mar 16, 2019 3:45 pm Post subject:

Welp, you're really not gonna be happy about how many votes Nicholas got for Worst Gimmick.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

All of them cast by his fellow professional wrestlers. Who are jealous about how embarrassingly their careers were shown up by the only true Mr. Perfect: Nicholas.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Sat Mar 30, 2019 1:21 am Post subject:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yq79Xvn3xys

WWE catches up with the legendary Nicholas.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Who?
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Sun Mar 31, 2019 5:46 pm Post subject:

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

That photo of his balls was actually an ominous threat.

Or are you only just realizing what's always been making that BONNNNNNNGGGGGG..... BONNNNNNNGGGGGG..... BONNNNNNNGGGGGG..... sound?
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2019 12:40 am Post subject:

If you weren't excited for Mania, well maybe ::checks notes:: Baron Corbin cleanly winning a match against Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle putting him in the ankle lock will uh, change your mind.

I guess Brock, Batista and Rousey wanted to go see Dumbo before it got too late or something.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

GIncognto · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 1250 Location: Bitters, WA

But the build for Triple H's match makes SOME sense, so that's all that really matters.
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GIncognto
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HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Don't forget, we're getting TWO battle royals!!! I always like to hang around with my friends and watch a bunch of wrestlers hanging around in the ring.

Will Konnor eliminate Tyler Breeze? (Maybe.) If so, will the elimination be shown on camera? (Maybe.) Which one is Tyler Breeze? (Someone will tell me.) Will they mention Mojo Rawley is a former Andre the Giant Battle Royal champion? (They really shouldn't.)
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2019 5:52 pm Post subject:

I have a feeling that Braun Strowman tossing Colin Jost and Michael Che over the top rope and onto a bunch of guys who only ever wrestle on Main Event is going to be used in WrestleMania packages for years.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

Foleyite · Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2019 11:40 pm Post subject:

RAW after Mania ratings, through the years

2014 -- 4.61 million
2015 -- 5.14 million
2016 -- 4.08 million
2017 -- 3.76 million
2018 -- 3.90 million
2019 -- 2.92 million

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6LOWKVq5sQ
_________________
"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

WWE's publicity department did a bad job getting out the word that Baron Corbin would be holding a celebration for his victory. That probably cost them 11 million viewers right there.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Sun Apr 14, 2019 3:49 pm Post subject:

Meltzer is saying The Undertaker signed some sort of new deal with WWE. He also cancelled the Q&As he was gonna do and is being replaced by Foley. That seems fair. A WWE lifer who never breaks kayfabe has dropped out, but in his place, you do get a guy who's written several books about his career and does standup and appears on stuff out of character all the time.

I guess WWE's noble "You should fulfill your prior commitments to other wrestling entities" thing only applies when they feel like it.

Not that I need Taker to break character and hear stories about Chainz tripping over his own pants at a house show once or whatever. So whatever. I do wonder how many more times they will trot him out for a match or a "OH MY GOD, ITS UNDERTAKER" segment where he interrupts somebody and hits a Tombstone, since he's looked pretty rough the last couple of years. Let the man REST.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

Foleyite · Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2019 4:07 pm Post subject:

Sad news today, as Punishment Martinez is no longer.

He is now Damien Priest.

So he got a ....better ... and yet, less good name?
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

Foleyite · Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2019 11:35 pm Post subject:

At least Damien Priest is better than THE VIKING EXPERIENCE.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Vince's abiding passion for "big meaty grunty blobfish guys" is not shared by me. However, I can fully get behind "The Viking Experience" as a good, ridiculous name.

But "Damien Priest"? That might be an unusual name on a sitcom or in your yearbook. But for WWE's Name the New Guy Mad Libs, it might as well be Dave Wilson.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:28 pm Post subject:

I'd like to cast my vote early this year for Best Gimmick in the Observer Awards.

Congratulations, Kevin Owens: Honorary New Day Member.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Vince's abiding passion for "big meaty grunty guys who sillydance" is not shared by me.

Except Brodus Clay.

(Preferably after Michael Cole's uproarious cackling is digitally excised from the audio.)
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

I just found out that The Viking Experience were previously called The War Raiders in NXT, which in turn was just a "we own the IP rights" switch from their Ring of Honor name "War Machine."

That only makes me want to double down, and say that The Viking Experience is indisputably twelve hundred times better than a generic bowl of blah like War Raiders, or War Machine, or War Lords, War Zone, War Dogs, Dogs of War, or WarioWare.

Easy for me to say, of course. I'm not either of the guys who'll be relegated to doing unfunny bathroom poop skits in 2 months.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

KaneRobot · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2143 Location: Bitters, Michigan

At least I won't confuse Viking # 2 with the MUSIC Hanson anymore since they changed his name to Thor or Gorgos the Destroyer or whatever. That definitely kept happening.

------------

I guess a couple of pretty well known WWF 80's themes were actually covers of existing songs from 1981. This is weird.

https://youtu.be/_zrIJOzg45A

https://youtu.be/fWCJOvhFHHQ
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HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

The most well-known and profitable example of this practice that I know of:

Listen to the original:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d38qNqc8N6k

Then, enjoy the recycled version:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wF45h9Gp_cs
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

KaneRobot · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2143 Location: Bitters, Michigan

They're now The Viking Raiders. NFL fans are torn.
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Foleyite · Posted: Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:57 pm Post subject:

I was already in "what the" mode over the JYD/Slick songs, but the Tonight Show/Carson theme being a cover is really a hugely weird revelation somehow.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

Foleyite · Posted: Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:57 pm Post subject:

KaneRobot · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2143 Location: Bitters, Michigan

"Oh shit, we forgot to write a song for the show intro! I guess I'll just use this old thing and add shave and a haircut to the end of it." -Doc Severinsen
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HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Johnny Carson got 50% of the publishing from Paul Anka. Each of them made a couple of million dollars on it. Carson made millions that should have been Anka's, but Anka made about 11 cents from it the first time... and the second time... and the third time.

Originally it was a 1958 instrumental called "Toot Sweet" that was a Disney B-side and bombed. Then Anka changed the title and added lyrics for an Annette Funicello release called "It's Really Love," but it bombed again. Not a crazy idea, since Annette had a few Top Ten hits at the exact same time. But no dice.

Okay, he made a lot more than 11 cents since there was an entire album in 1960 called "Annette Sings Anka" that hit #21 on the Billboard chart and Anka got all the songwriting royalties. But that wasn't nearly as much as Anka was making on his hugely successful career with a dozen hits including two #1 songs and two #2's. Nevertheless, Anka's own version of "It's Really Love" did nothing, either.

Settling for half of the Tonight Show theme in 1962 was worth way more than 100% of "Toot Sweet/It's Really Love."
_________________
"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Anyway, Viking Raiders? v.4.0?

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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Mr Perfect · Posted: Thu Apr 25, 2019 6:25 pm Post subject:

Not to worry. As the Wrestling Observer tells us: "McMahon pointed out that WWE will experience a 'whole new beginning' this September when the Fox era begins."

So please look forward to this "new era" where you'll see "sweeping change" and bear witness as everything "begins again."

And while you're in that mindset, you should also be aware that Vince has two buildings in Connecticut he'd like to sell you.

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

I hope these are them; I've already applied for two mortgages:

_________________
"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Fri Apr 26, 2019 12:38 am Post subject:

Foleyite · Posted: Fri Apr 26, 2019 8:54 pm Post subject:

Remember how much Austin's injuries in 1997 and 2000 hurt storylines and the WWF's "engagement metrics"?
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

Dave Mesv#l(urr Combines Sick Burns With Bygone Similitude, Vol. XXXII:

Foleyite · Posted: Mon Apr 29, 2019 7:12 pm Post subject:

Apparently, The Revival were offered a 5 year extension with WWE and turned it down today.

In unrelated news, The Revival will be losing a handicap match to Mojo Rawley tonight on Raw.
_________________
"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal

HelloDes · Joined: 02 Mar 2007 Posts: 2783 Location: Bitters, Iceland

You mean The Revival Experience, featuring Dancin' Dash and Sexii Scott.
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"Lodi showed up and said Saturn threw him in the river. He had a fish in his pants."

Foleyite · Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2019 12:29 am Post subject:

Of course, Vince couldn't even wait 12 hours to have his company write something that questioned these guys' manliness and make them the object of ridicule. Never change, Vince. Actually, uh please change. You're a thoroughly despicable human being.
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"Do you know what my New Year's resolution is going to be? To wake up a half an hour earlier so I can hate you more." -- Lord Steven Regal